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Archive for February, 2020

Keeping to our new years resolutions

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At the beginning of each year, most people set New Year resolutions all with good intentions. As it happens it is already that time of the year where life returns to normal and the new year resolutions no longer apply. This is the time where suddenly you can find parking at the gym and the water bottles in meetings slowly reappear.

I often wonder why that is the case? What is it about the beginning of the year that has an effect of awakening our best ambitions and life goals are somewhat brought to the fore? I do not know what is it about us as a human species that makes us to be conscious of our longevity and survival that comes to being at the beginning of a new year. Let me attempt to answer this at least from my perspective and with the biggest disclaimer that I am not a prophet or someone who professes to know what drives human behavior. For what is worth let me offer my thoughts.

We are creatures of habit – As people and a species, we follow habit and do certain things because we have always done them that way and it becomes second nature. Coming up with new year resolutions is one of those things we do every year and it has become habitual behavior. Part of the journey is to break the cycle and do things based on intention as opposed to habit.

We are social beings – As social beings we tend to go with the flow and have a big need to belong. We, by virtue of being human do not like to do things on our own and would rather be counted as ‘one of’, we often have a need to do what others do. We need to respect this phenomenon as a big factor of who we are and our social conditioning often determines what we can or not do.

How to change this?

I would like to offer a few key suggestions that will help us to keep our resolutions and these are:

  1. Our resolutions must be congruent with our values – the more our resolutions are in line with our values the higher the chances of us keeping and achieving them. Our values determine who we are, hence it is important to ensure the alignment.
  2. We need to live on purpose – this requires us to dig deep and determine what our essence and mission in life is. Drawing up a personal mission statement goes a long way in assisting us with living on purpose.
  3. Write our resolutions down – there is power in having things written. It creates a connection between thinking and doing. The more resolutions are written down and read every single day there higher the chances for execution.

There could be more to keep us thinking and keeping true to our own commitments to ourselves, the three suggestions made above could help.

With love

Pam The Coach


Show some love

love 2020

February is known as the month of love. Valentine’s Day falls in this month and the shops are filled with various commodities or symbols of love.

I am often unsure on how to respond to the big hype around this month. Some years I am cynical and others I embrace it. To put it crudely I blow hot and cold. Sometimes I debate whether or not it is correct for me to be ambivalent or should I stand firm like the rest of world and celebrate.

This year I have chosen to make a big deal out of it… I have chosen to be open to receiving and giving love, whilst remembering that self-love is at the core of this. I have chosen to make a big deal out of it, because I think us women we need to be celebrated and be showered with affection because we deserve it.

The question is then how do I show love to my sisters during this time. I have decided to offer 10 copies of my book (Women and leadership – Conversations that matter) to 10 deserving women. To even show more love I have decided to sponsor the courier costs of the book. All in the spirit of generosity!!! I think it is a small token of appreciation to my sisters who have continued to hold the knife from the sharp end whilst nurturing their loved ones.

The first 10 women who recommend 10 other sisters to join the pamthecoach Facebook group; will each get an autographed copy. You see how this works?… I show love….You in turn show love to 10 other women by inviting them to join the group of like minded women. When we are done….110 Women would have benefited something in one way or the other.

In ending my blog this week I leave you with a quote…”I fell in love with you because of the million things you never knew you were doing” – Anonymous

Many women/sisters do a million things to keep nations; organizations; families and relationships together without even expecting anything in return; recognition or compensation as these things come naturally to them. Many women/sisters are the glue that hold society together and they selflessly play this role.

This Valentine’s Day I want to hon our and salute women/sisters and say we see you and we feel you and continue to illuminate the world. Continue to represent what is best about humanity. Finally continue to be the beacons of hope.

“Love is the greatest force in the universe. It is the heart beat of the moral cosmos. He who loves is a participant in the being of God” – Martin Luther King Jr.

Happy Valentines Day!

With love…

Pam The Coach

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