I feel so inspired!!!

Last Friday (8 March 2019), we celebrated International Women’s Day. I do not know about others… but as a woman, I really felt good for being recognized and acknowledged for the efforts that I make to the betterment of the world in tackling the patriarchal tendencies of society.

I was particularly intrigued by some of the comments that some women made on Facebook. Without quoting who said what, these were some that I observed with keen interest…

“International Women’s Day is not only about equal rights for women. The purpose of IWD is to create awareness around patriarchy. The core reason why the relationship between that of women and men becomes one of dominance and oppression.”

“Today is International Women’s Day. The theme for this year is #balanceforbetter – a call to action for driving gender balance across the world.  So how will you be spending your day Phenomenal Woman?”

“Strong women aren’t simply born. We are forged through the challenges of life. Happy International Women’s Day”

Just by simply taking a sample from some of these rich messages and comments made by women, one is excited to note the level of appreciation of what is at stake with regard to women’s emancipation. I am also alive to the inspirational and celebratory nature of the messages.

This brings me to the event I hosted on the day. Over 40 women from different age groups were in attendance. Their personal stories and journeys’, the sisterhood, tips and tools shared were all amazing and gave full expression to the saying(s) that  “the future is female” and “surround yourself with women who bring out the very best in you”.

I certainly was in the company of leaders and above all else, I felt that I belong. I also felt that I still have much to learn from the sisters that were in attendance. I have no doubt in my mind that all of the women that were in attendance are ready to take their rightful place in society, step out and “think equal”. The journey in front of us is to harness that ‘sisterly energy ‘ into concrete actions, that not only seek to get us to the forefront of determining our destiny but is also a journey to enrich ourselves with the requisite skills for “building smart and innovate for change”.  This will enable us to do what we have to do, to ensure the desired outcome.

I, as a leadership coach… Who has set myself a value proposition that goes “I help women leaders and change makers achieve breakthroughs in all aspects of their lives” … have my work cut out for me. I am certainly feeling energized to dig deep and reinvent myself and my offerings in order to respond to the need out there. I am inspired and I am up to the challenge…

“Watch this space!”

Celebrating the Women of the World

In a week’s time we will be celebrating International Women’s Day under the UN theme “Think equal, build smart, innovate for change”.   This theme really talks to me as a middle aged South African woman who sometimes feel overwhelmed by just a mere will to survive.   You can ask the question, why is that?’’  Here is the thing… We still live in the most unequal and unrepresentative society that as a woman I have to work extra hard to prove my worth and value.

 

I believe I am not alone, there are many sisters out there, young and old, who have to constantly swim against the tide, just for the world to recognise that “Women Matter”  It is not the time to lament, however we will be naïve and amiss of our mission in life if we do not pause and reflect on how far we have come and we still have to go whilst staking our claim in the future.

 

At this moment I pause to salute Mama Dorothy Masuka who a few days ago took her final bow.  She is a legend and a music icon who took to the stage and applied her craft in the worst of times.  The spirit of this woman (imbokodo) and many others of her generation uplifted many of us in the darkest days and kept the light shining despite the odds.  She was a beacon of hope and a pillar of strength for many.  As I internalize this year’s theme, I take solace in her spirit and urge other women to take up the mantle and rise to the challenge.

 

It is a time to celebrate and honour those that came before us, at the same time it a time to honour those of us who continue to hold the fort and demonstrate high levels of resilience and courage in pursuit of our dreams and happiness. As a woman today I derive strength from Robert Schuller’s words where he says  “If it going to be…it’s up to me”.   That is the essence of my message to the sisters out there today as we continue to march forward and make the world a better place for current and future generations.

 

As part of these celebrations I am super excited to be hosting another international women’s day celebration event on the 8^th of March in Pretoria, Gauteng.  It is held to celebrate and honour the phenomenal women out there and add my voice of encouragement to everyone to “Think equal, build smart, innovate for change. We will come together as sisters to celebrate, reflect and support each in through sisterhood spirit. If you are interested to attend please contact Ziyanda – Ziyanda@zenandeleadership.com and book your front row seat at no cost to you.  We are pulling out all stops to make this day as productive and worthwhile as we can.  I love these events as they energize me and give me a new perspective to find ways of being and continue to define my relevance and purpose.

 

I am looking forward to celebrate this day with some of you in person and others virtually.

 

 

Pam

“Helping women leaders and change makers achieve breakthrough in all aspects of their lives”

Celebrating the Women of the World

In a week’s time we will be celebrating International Women’s Day under the UN theme “Think equal, build smart, innovate for change”.   This theme really talks to me as a middle aged South African woman who sometimes feel overwhelmed by just a mere will to survive.   You can ask the question, why is that?’’  Here is the thing… We still live in the most unequal and unrepresentative society that as a woman I have to work extra hard to prove my worth and value.

 

I believe I am not alone, there are many sisters out there, young and old, who have to constantly swim against the tide, just for the world to recognise that “Women Matter”  It is not the time to lament, however we will be naïve and amiss of our mission in life if we do not pause and reflect on how far we have come and we still have to go whilst staking our claim in the future.

 

At this moment I pause to salute Mama Dorothy Masuka who a few days ago took her final bow.  She is a legend and a music icon who took to the stage and applied her craft in the worst of times.  The spirit of this woman (imbokodo) and many others of her generation uplifted many of us in the darkest days and kept the light shining despite the odds.  She was a beacon of hope and a pillar of strength for many.  As I internalize this year’s theme, I take solace in her spirit and urge other women to take up the mantle and rise to the challenge.

 

It is a time to celebrate and honour those that came before us, at the same time it a time to honour those of us who continue to hold the fort and demonstrate high levels of resilience and courage in pursuit of our dreams and happiness. As a woman today I derive strength from Robert Schuller’s words where he says  “If it going to be…it’s up to me”.   That is the essence of my message to the sisters out there today as we continue to march forward and make the world a better place for current and future generations.

 

As part of these celebrations I am super excited to be hosting another international women’s day celebration event on the 8^th of March in Pretoria, Gauteng.  It is held to celebrate and honour the phenomenal women out there and add my voice of encouragement to everyone to “Think equal, build smart, innovate for change. We will come together as sisters to celebrate, reflect and support each in through sisterhood spirit. If you are interested to attend please contact Ziyanda – Ziyanda@zenandeleadership.com and book your front row seat at no cost to you.  We are pulling out all stops to make this day as productive and worthwhile as we can.  I love these events as they energize me and give me a new perspective to find ways of being and continue to define my relevance and purpose.

 

I am looking forward to celebrate this day with some of you in person and others virtually.

 

 

Pam

“Helping women leaders and change makers achieve breakthrough in all aspects of their lives”

L-0-V-E

February is known as the month of love.  We see a lot of people committing themselves or each other to a relationship as a way of celebrating love.   This is often a marvel to watch and one can’t ignore the open expression of love and affection and the sharing of love messages around Valentines Day.

 

I am writing this blog just to add my voice on how important love is in our relationships.  This could be romantic or professional relationships and I thought one can share a few points on some important elements for lasting relationships.

 

Before I do that… let me hasten to say that the best relationship to nurture and focus on in the first instance is a relationship with self.   Self-love and self care/nurturing for me is at the top of my priorities.   When we love ourselves and accept us as we are we tend to be less dependent on others.  Our expectations are more manageable as we have created the foundational base for our being and relate with others from a point of power.   It goes without saying that we need to invest in the things we love and ensure that we allocate time and resources towards ourselves… This could be the time to read; buy yourself gifts; spend time with self; make time to rest and rejuvenate; learning to say no etc.   Whatever it is that tickles your fancy, I just want to affirm you and say….” Yes, I matter”

 

Having set the foundation one would like to share a few relationship anchors that make any relationship last and I do not profess to be an express in this field however I feed the need to share my thoughts and views just to put things out there in the open for us to engage on.   Of course not every point resonates with everyone and there could be other additional anchors … Lets hear them and keep sharing in the spirit of love.

 

Here are my anchors;

 

• Relationships work better when there is a shared future, goals and these are based on a common set of values and approaches to life or work. I have seen many team members or even couples, struggle with defining what are their common shared values! What is their outlook of the future?  Do they see the world and the organisation they work for in the same way?  Do they have a common or similar approach on how to get to that future?  I always suggest that this for any team it is important to discuss the “future they want” right from the beginning.
• Trust is an important anchor. This can be developed over time but when it is absent often times there are doubts and questioning of people you hear terms like…” he/she has a hidden agenda”. Some people hold the view that trust is earned and it develops in a person showing dependability and reliability.  I know for sure the absence of trust leads to instability, retards growth and usurps energy.  Spend time in defining what this means for you and seek to find or build it for mutual benefit.
• Shared Vulnerability – Brene Brown gives a powerful TED talk on the subject of vulnerability and discusses how some of us because of a fear, tend not to open ourselves up because we will be seen as not to be good enough or even not so perfect, intelligent or strong. I have news for you, as the secret to strong connection is vulnerability.  Go out there show that you are human, can make mistakes and learn from them; indicate when you are scared or you do not have all the answers.  It is in the vulnerability that the personal growth and connection arises.
• Acceptance and forgiveness – This begins with accepting yourself as you are and knowing that nobody is perfect or as they say “there is perfection in the imperfections” and this will help you grow. Forgive yourself and others for sometimes letting you down and accept that love resides where there is acceptance and forgiveness.

 

As we celebrate this time please remember that love is important and we need to love ourselves so that we can love others. We are capable of loving and all we need to do is just to give ourselves permission to do so.

 

Loving you always

 

Pam

 

 

P.S Have you signed up for the upcoming International Women’s Day Event to be held on 8 March 2019?…  I would love to see more of you guys at the event where we can talk about these and other topics.

 

For more information, please contact:

ziyanda@zenandeleadership.com

Phone: 012 998 7337

The big bang theory!

We are in the last week of January and I can’t believe how fast this first month has gone. A lot of people refer to January as the longest month of the year and this is informed largely by the cash flow situation which is often created by the overindulgence during the festive holidays. Often times the anxiety passes very quickly and the excitement of a chance to rewrite the script surpasses any tinge of regret.

 

I like the re framing attitude and spirit that often permeates society. The narrative quickly changes to that of new beginnings and the opportunity this brings. To be honest we can spend our lives self-beating and regretting the past and certainly I do not subscribe to this approach. Life is to be celebrated and enjoyed and yes sometimes we can overdo it but we learn and move on. We cannot be stuck in what could have been we need to quickly move to what is possible.

 

I am a bit apprehensive about this month ending, as it has suddenly dawned on me that a whole month is gone and I am not where I should be in terms of execution of my 2019 plans. They are indeed quite ambitious plans to think of it but a big part of me likes the drive and living on the edge. It does feed an internal need, whilst at the same opening up a personal growth point. Well… that is a topic for another day.

 

Coming to what I want to share today and that is to embed the concept of personal goal setting. I am spending time on this topic in the upcoming Facebook Lives sessions starting this Tuesday the 29th until the 31st January at 19h30 till 20h00. I find this an exciting topic and liberating depending on your perspective. There are two schools of thought in this regard as some people don’t see the need. I definitely belong to a different school, as for me it is a way of turning my dreams and ambitions into concrete and measurable actions. It’s a way of holding myself accountable to me. I find when I accomplish my goals, I get incredibly motivated to be more and be more.

 

Over the years I have learnt a few things about setting personal goals and these are:

 

• My goals must be linked and be congruent to my personal values otherwise they would be less about me and what I stand for.
• My second biggest lesson is that I need to run my own race so my goals are uniquely me and much more authentic.
• I have also learnt that I need to pace things realistically so that they can be achievable and also motivating.
• Finally, and more importantly I need to be grateful for every step and I invest time in counting my blessings throughout the journey.

 

As I begin 2019, I have set goals for myself, my business and my general well being. I have a 2019 road map and I need to honor these. By honoring the goals, I am also honoring myself and I like that! It’s an act of self-respect and self-love. I am excited about what I have for you as my friends and clients and watch this space there is going to be milestones achieved, announcements made and champagne galore!! I claim personal success for all of us obviously based on personal goals.

 

Cheers and happy goal setting

 

 

P.s See you at the Facebook live sessions as we begin 2019 with a bang!!

We made it! Now lets get to it!!!

Yipeee we made it into 2019 and how exciting it is to have made it thus far. Everywhere one goes in the month of January one is met with loving, congratulatory and encouraging greetings….” Happy New Year, Compliments of the New Year….All of the best for 2019, so it goes. It is indeed a feel good time.

For some people it is a time of deep reflection and contemplation. What have I achieved? What do I have to show? What impact am I gonna make moving forward? What goals am I gonna set for myself for the New Year? For some people it is a time for new beginnings…..try something new, challenge myself more, aim to achieve more. Whatever your frame of reference is, it is indeed a time to start afresh and try out some exciting things or breathe a new lease of life to old projects or goals.

For me, I personally believe it is a time to dream bigger and reinvent myself. It is a time to say how can I be of more influence or share my gifts with the world. This is the time I release past failures and mishaps and say to myself it is a new year, what did not work is in the past where I am now I have a chance to take another bite at the cherry. I do that through planning and setting myself goals and realistic targets.

Ben Brearly identifies planning as a means to communicate expectations and creating certainty in organizations. He further sees planning as a tool to help leaders hold people accountable. I share Ben’s conviction and personally I am always fascinated about how motivated people are when there is clarity on the intended destination and I have seen and experienced how this contributes to team effectiveness.

At another level engaging in personal planning creates an opportunity to discover your innate skills and finding ways of best utilizing them to get the greatest amount of satisfaction and enjoyment from everything you do. Brian Tracy contends that when you engage in personal strategic planning you embark on a journey of increasing your “return on energy”. I am a firm believer of setting personal goals and holding myself accountable for the achievement of the things I have set for myself. I see this as both liberating and creating purposefulness.

I have come across a few people and friends who never set goals and who just go with the flow. There might be value in that, I would not know however I hold a very strong view that where there is clarity there is bound to be better action.

I intend to share my thoughts on this and also the tools I use to develop and manage planning and implementation. If it is not for you it’s understandable however I would strongly urge you to give it some thought and join me on Facebook Live as I explore this topic and related matters. I will be doing this over 3 days from the 28th to the 30th of January. If you are not on Facebook don’t despair just pop me an email and I will gladly send you the recordings.

Happy planning and see you soon!

Pam

Working with leaders achieve personal effectiveness and organisational prosperity”

www.zenandeleadership.com

info@zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337/ +27 82 550 5225

Skype: pam.the.coach

Celebrating our own- against all odds

As I am writing this I am airborne. Yes 37000 feet above sea level. Those that know me well will know what this means given my fear of flying.

Be that as it may I am cruising at 37 000 feet and decided to confront my fears and write this short piece to the sisters out there as a word of encouragement and affirmation.  The desire to celebrate at the moment far outweighs the fear and as I am happy to embrace the moment and forget about my daily struggles and jot something down in women’s honour.

We are celebrating women’s month and regardless of the issues that face women today and society today e.g. femicide,  increasing trend of under representation in key structures of political parties,  rising unemployment and economic hardships etc.   I still believe that this is  a momentous occasion. Women still need to be being celebrated for their efforts and bravery across the length and breadth of our country.  The other motivation for writing this piece is to join South Africans in honouring a struggle veteran, Ma Albertina Sisulu – who through their struggles and selfless commitment to bring about change and make the world a better place to live for current and future generations.

It is a moment of celebration whilst acknowledging the reversal of  some of our gains in society.    It is a moment of stepping forward whilst acknowledging our vulnerability.  (Noting that showing vulnerability is a sign of strength and has more to do with being human than being weak).   It is a moment of expressing concern whilst acknowledging the victories and gallant strides of our forebears. More importantly it is a moment to reflect whilst recalibrating our bright bright future.

Our future is bright and not less rocky though. Women have done it before and we can stand tall and say that history is on our side but only if we step up to the plate. It is a bright future but only if we face our fears and rise to the occasion. It is a future alive with possibilities only if we don’t delegate what it poses on us and urging us to march ahead. It is a time for sisterhood; young and old to stand up and be counted.

I want to use this time to honour my mothers; sisters and forebears to remember that the 9th of August 1956 was a historic moment. It defined history and it propelled us to move forward and never look back.  As a result, no matter what we should all stand up and say forward ever and continue to change the South African political and economic landscape.

As we celebrate Women’s month I would like to raise my hand and be counted. I would like to foster sisterhood. I would like to stand alongside my sisters( young and old) and say if it’s gonna be then it’s up to me. I raise my hand and I say “Count me in” not because it’s women’s month but because history calls on me to rise and shine and contribute to a brighter future for all women regardless of age; race; occupation; sexual orientation or religion.

This month I am in and I am marching forward to a rewarding and bright future. I commit to sisterhood; girls support and advancing our noble cause. More importantly I commit to love and dedication. Love for humanity and dedication to change the status quo and work towards a better world.

In honour of Ma Sisulu’s efforts and other mothers like Winnie Madikizela Mandela and in the spirit of Thuma Mina I have decided to set aside the 29th of August as a day of “free mentoring session” for women leaders.  All you need to do is indicate your interest at info@zenandeleadership.com or call 012 998 7337 to book your slot.   On this day I will be working with women leaders who have immediate challenges or burning issues to share or help navigate and work one on one to try and resolve these or agree on an approach.    I am super excited about this opportunity and should you want to take me up on it….you know what to do.

Happy Women’s Month