Loving what is!!!!

February is celebrated as a month of love. All our stores and restaurants are already gearing up for mega sales; romantic dinners; red roses etc.; all of this leading to Valentines Day.  Of course all of these are symbols of love as well as expression and appreciation of what is good between humans. It is a time of plenty; celebration; commitment and appreciation.

This year is particularly interesting as the 14th of February marks the beginning of Lent. Those who believe know that Lent is the beginning of a time of sacrifice and repentance. It is a time when Christians through fasting or giving up certain vices; embark on a journey of spiritual preparation for Easter and a time for deeper connection with God.

When I realized this I could not help but wonder why are these two events occurring on the same day in 2018. I have been cracking my skull, wondering if this is a contradiction or a unity of opposites. In philosophy unity of opposites is taken to “define a situation in which the identity of a thing or situation depends on the coexistence of at least two conditions which are opposite each other and presupposing each other, within a field of tension”

I have come to the conclusion that this is by no means an accident; it is a time of deep reflection on what lens do we use to look at life? It is a time to look at the concept of love from a completely different perspective. It brings to bare that the expression of love can be multidimensional and if you take a cursory look at it you can see contradictions. Sacrificing something as an expression of love; whilst at the same abundance and celebration can be an expression of love!

Here is the thing- do we focus on celebration or do we focus on sacrifice? Are these concepts opposite or presupposing each other? The more I look at it; the more I see the connection…. it is LOVE itself.

Love is the foundation of our being… it has a number of dimensions, which at face value might look diametrically opposite to one another and yet they are intertwined in the most fundamental way!!! It also is the epitome of the co-dependencies, which are present in our paths as we journey through life.

As we approach this month of love…. let’s us remember it’s all about the lens you are using to look at any given situation. If you focus on the difference then you will have a different outcome to what is. At the same time if you focus on the connection you will also have a different outcome to what is.

My advice is in this month of LOVE let just focus on loving what is and by so doing we shorten our path to joy and fulfilment.

I would love to meet you in my programs (please visit www.zenandeleadership.com)

Loving you always

Pam Yako

Leadership and Success Coach

‘Helping women leaders to be attuned and find their inner goddess’

http://www.zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337 or +27 82 550 5225

pam@zenandeleadership.com

Skype: pam.the.coach

p.s. please feel free to contact me if you wanna learn or chat some more or sign up for my newsletter at http://www.zenandeleadership.com

 

 

What are you grateful for

Gratitude is the ability to be thankful and appreciative for all things in life. Things might be good or appear to be bad and as the Bible says…. in all situations give thanks.

Oftentimes we go through situations where things don’t go our way.  We don’t get the job we want; we don’t get a tender; we carry extra weight; we lose our friends or lovers or we can’t pay our bills etc. Those situations often invoke a sense of despair where we want to give up or even worse start blaming ourselves.

Have you ever sat and reflected on the blessings those situations bring? It could be a message to start afresh; change direction; recalibrate or simply gather more strength and tenacity to give yourself a second chance.

Here is the thing…. I believe in the saying that “everything happens for a reason” and we need to be grateful that it happened as this will make you wiser and give you another perspective. Many successful people have one thing in common they exercise gratitude and embrace the deep learning that comes with failure or a setback.

As we start 2018 I invite you to join the gratitude trip and give yourself time and permission to reflect and see the bright side of life or embrace the belief system that says, “Joy comes in the morning”. Maya Angelou (one of my favorite and inspiring poets) talks about us being a rainbow in someone else’s cloud and that someone could be you; a family member; a friend or a colleague.

Here some gratitude tips:

• Keep a gratitude journal and everyday write Keep a gratitude journal and everyday write down 5 things that you are grateful for on that day – Oprah has been doing this for at least 16 years;
• As you wake up each day say thank you to God/universe that you woke up that day (practice this daily for 42 days and it will become a habit);
• Speak your gratitude – as you find parking in a busy shopping mall; miss that accident or slow traffic on the highway; a stranger gives way in an intersection; someone offers their seat to you on the train/bus – say thank you!!!!
• Create a gratitude jar… Add slips of paper in a jar with reasons on why you are grateful (like we you used to keep a cash/money box and before we know we have saved cash). Buy the jar from Clicks or somewhere like that and use Post-it notes to write; and
• Buy or offer small tokens of appreciation for friends and colleagues to show gratitude.

These are small gestures and practices that help to refocus us towards the bright side of life. You do it consistently and consciously then your happiness bank will show a positive balance.

I am grateful that God has given me the courage to share my gifts and worldview with you through this blog and other programs that I offer.

I would love to meet you in my programs (please visit www.zenandeleadership.com) and for now let me say “Ciao”

Forever grateful

Pam Yako

Leadership and Success Coach

‘Helping women leaders to be attuned and find their inner goddess’

http://www.zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337 or +27 82 550 5225

pam@zenandeleadership.com

Skype: pam.the.coach

p.s. please feel free to contact me if you wanna learn or chat some more or sign up for my newsletter at http://www.zenandeleadership.com

What do you focus on?

2018 is upon us and I hope that everyone has an awesome year ahead.

I have a great feeling that this year has a lot of positive things in store for me personally; the country and the world at large. It can only be better from here…. C’mon let’s face it; the world becomes a better place when all of us start looking on the bright side of life.

This brings me to the essence of my blog today. Firstly it is to reconnect with you in the New Year. Secondly it is to share the personal space I am in and thirdly is to invite you to join on a self-fulfilling journey of self-love and self-belief.

2017 might have been a long and difficult year for some and they are hoping that 2018 will be somehow be miraculously better. Well here is the thing…. it all depends on what you focus on. If you focus on what went well and be grateful for it then the whole picture changes.

I choose to focus on the positive things that happened in 2017 and guess what? I have now realized that I have just had the most amazing year, filled with love and abundance. It is so because for once I have stopped focusing on “lack” but more on what I gained and what I experienced. Even the things that did not go well; as some did; were not a result of a lack of effort on my part; it was just life. The reality is that you win some and you lose some as you “dance with life”. Where I have not achieved my goals I have gained a lot of wisdom and experience and that is what I am focusing on.

This good feeling is what I am bringing into the New Year. I have drawn up a new list of things to achieve and I will relentlessly pursue these in the only way I know how. Hopefully I will achieve all or maybe not however; I know for sure that come end of 2018 I will be a better human being.

In 2018 I am focusing on my strengths; my achievements and my God given gifts and I am inviting you to do the same. I have developed new programs for you and I commit to write more. Just to share some of the things in store:

• Host and launch of the Dining Room table Mastermind series for professionals and entrepreneurs in February;
• Host the Grahamstown Girls Leadership project from February 2018 in partnership with Nombulelo and Ntsika High Schools;
• Hosting the Annual Free Online Women in Leadership Conference on the 8&9th of March;
• Launch my e-book on the “Unleash your inner goddess- 5 C’s to your destination” by end of January;
• Finalize and publish the book on the Personal Stories of some Phenomenal SA Women (most ambitious project to date); and
• Host the Women Leaders Retreat in September 2018.

These are some of the things that are on my to do list this year and just the mere thought of how much am stretching myself in 2018 gives me goose bumps. Of course all of this is made possible by a focus on the right things and having the right mindset.

Let’s keep in touch this year, as I would really like to connect and share my gifts with you.

Interested in any more info: visit my website www.zenandeleadership.com or give me a call or send me an email.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light; not our Darkness; that most frightens us” – Marianne Williamson.

I choose to focus on Light…. Happy 2018.

Pam Yako

Leadership and Success Coach

‘Helping women leaders to be attuned and find their inner goddess’

http://www.zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337 or +27 82 550 5225

pam@zenandeleadership.com

Skype: pam.the.coach

 

 

Love and Success

Last week I celebrated my birthday and I was so humbled by the amount of love that I was showered with. This included my social media friends; ex colleagues; business partners; clients; family and close friends.

This experience once again taught me how fortunate I am to be a human being and to be surrounded by such love and affection. It reinforced my long held belief that people are inherently good. They are often looking for outlets to show and express their love and kindness. Of course someone’s birthday gives them that opportunity and space to say …you are one of us; you matter and we love you.

Given that reality what is then my reciprocal responsibility as a person? Surely it must be to receive love and also give love. It must also mean to live a life that is worthy of being called a human being and do onto others in the same way I have been or like to be treated.

I cannot fulfill this responsibility if I don’t attach a significant meaning to being human. It means that my definition or outlook of success must include the notion of giving and receiving love. You can give love by fully embracing the concept through a number of ways namely:

Building lasting relationships;
Applying your trade to the best of your ability;
Being an ambassador of excellence;
Looking after yourself; and
Being a good citizen by living a life of integrity and benevolence.

In my next workshop (s) to be held on 28th October and on November 18 (choose one); I would be exploring the concept of SUCCESS for individual participants.

I know for me it definitely includes LOVE and am curious to find what it means for others.

As I conclude I would like to end with a quote on Love….”We loved with a love that was more than love” ( Edgar Allan Poe).

Love and Success to all

Pam Yako

Leadership and Success Coach

pam@zenandeleadership.com

012 9987337

Interested in attending the workshops?  Visit:  www.zenandeleadership.com to register.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sweet taste of success

Last month we ushered in a new season…Spring. For many of us it is a time for renewal and rebirth. It is the last season as we prepare for summer and the year-end. People use this time to get rid of all of winter’s practices (good or bad). For some people it is time to get back on the grind and accelerate the pace to the proverbial finish line.

The hive of activity that is focused on self-renewal; care and rejuvenation is encouraging; fascinating and a marvel to watch. I genuinely love the idea of people doing more and working on being more. I have also witnessed some feelings of despondency when people either realize that they are either behind on their plans or have regressed. Whatever your personal circumstances are, we should not despair; as you can start again…why not?  It’s a season of second chances.

I have decided to write about success as I have observed that oftentimes the anxiety around the spring season is linked to progress towards someone’s dreams and goals. I have spent the winter months reading about the concept of “success” and sought to translate it to what it means for me. The more I researched the topic the more I realized the personal nature of the meaning and application. Just to give you a teaser on some of the thinking and discoveries

“The key to success is to start before you are ready” – Marie Forleo

“Unsuccessful people make decisions on their current situation. Successful people make decisions based on where they want to be” (Quoteistan.com) 

“ I’m coming for everything they said I couldn’t have” (Words of Success, Instagram)

It dawned on me that success means different things to different people however at the core of that is a personal decision.   Oftentimes we think about “what would others think of me” if I don’t succeed or measure our success based on others or societal pressures. I do believe that there is a lot of value in benchmarking what we do and our way of being with others however comparing ourselves to others can be quite disempowering and lead to feelings of despondency…”I am not good enough.”

I am super excited to be sharing my discoveries and share them by hosting a workshop series on “Nurturing Success”. During the workshop (s) we work on a personal definition, reflect on our unique circumstances, create the necessary benchmarks and then set up monitoring measures that are unique and tailored to the individual. We do this in a chilled; non-judgmental; supportive and interactive one day workshop (s) on Oct 28 and Nov 18 2017…please choose one day.

The workshops are individually based; foster a sense of collectivism and creativity with the support of a leadership and success coach. There is space to reflect; design and learn new tools for nurturing our success journey.

Let’s face it…being successful is cool…provided you have defined it for yourself based on your own values; dreams and aspirations.

Join me and embark on a rewarding success discovery and individual mapping journey as I can I assure that we all looooove the sweet taste of victory.

Pam Yako

Leadership and Success Coach

‘Helping women leaders to be attuned and find their inner goddess’

http://www.zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337 or +27 82 550 5225

pam@zenandeleadership.com

Skype: pam.the.coach

p.s. please feel free to contact me if you wanna learn more about this or sign up for my newsletter at http://www.zenandeleadership.com

 

 

 

Leading through change

Last week I wrote about “weathering the storm’ and that was a first bite at the interesting topic of leading in challenging times. I gathered enough information to write a second blog on the same issue. Is it not wonderful that notwithstanding the challenging and volatile times that a lot of practioners and authors are sharing with the rest of us their thoughts and experiences on how best to navigate the times?

Let us count ourselves as extremely blessed that notwithstanding the so-called adverse conditions there is enough material at our disposal to equip us with the relevant tools.

John Maxwell’s reflections on the topic are quite encouraging as he asks the question – when do people need a leader the most? He argues that it is in times of volatility and uncertainty, as most people often freeze; stand still; start doubting themselves and there is a lot of indecision. He sights the role the then Mayor of New York, Rudy Giuliani played during the 9/11 crisis. What had happened in New York was unprecedented and many people were left despondent. The role Mayor Giuliani played was instructive in terms of leading the charges, making the necessary decisions to bring New York back to functionality; created a makeshift command centre whilst calming everybody in and around the city.

Leading from the front requires agility, self-confidence, resilience and clarity of purpose. Great leaders are not the ones who run for cover during difficult times; they stand up to be counted and ensure that they rally the troops and bring a sense of hope and direction, in other words they bring a certain level of calmness to the situation and bring everybody on board in seeing the bigger picture.

It is my submission that in order to play this role a leader needs to have certain attributes that they bring to the party and these I discuss below:

• Know your worth– leaders need to know what they stand for; what are their strengths and what destination/direction are they leading everybody to?   Often times I ask leaders what do they have to offer; what do they bring to the organisation and more importantly what is their legacy? I often get surprised about how many people have not confronted these questions. My advice is – spend time on these big questions and create clear and measurable indicators for yourself in whatever leadership role you play.
• Be content – knowing your worth and value proposition put a leader in great stead to lead the charges and often times he or she is less swayed by stuff that derails them from their course. They are able to discern between a small breeze that is creating a minor turbulence from the real winds of change, which might even require a change in strategy and tactics. More importantly, they know when things are about themselves and when stuff is about the environment and are able to respond appropriately.  In addition, they are confident in what they do and don’t personalize things.
• Strengthen your emotional intelligence – I have come across many leaders and managers who are often not conscious of their impact on others. They could be knowledgeable and outstanding individual performers but are oblivious to the needs of the collective and often lose support from team members just by the way they relate to others.   The doorway to greater emotional intelligence is self-awareness. Ask for feedback on how you impact on people and dedicate time to personal reflection as well.  Maya Angelou famous quote on this is – “I have learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but will never forget how you made them feel”
• Build stamina and grit – this quality is required and gives you that extra motivation to work harder than everyone else.   Angela Duckworth’s work on this is instructive and she defines “grit” as that extra something that separates the most successful people from the rest – it’s the passion, perseverance and stamina that we must channel in order to stick to our dreams until they become a reality.

I am starting Mastermind classes in September in order to work with leaders to build these often intangible but necessary skills. Working in groups and online (video calls from the comfort of your office/home) I will be leading conversations and engagements with like-minded leaders who are prepared to invest in themselves and build their success index up a few notches. If you are game please contact me so that we enroll you accordingly.

Pam Yako

Leadership and Success Coach

‘Helping women leaders to be attuned and find their inner goddess’

http://www.zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337 or +27 82 550 5225

pam@zenandeleadership.com

Skype: pam.the.coach

p.s. please feel free to contact me if you want to learn more about this or sign up for my newsletter at http://www.zenandeleadership.com

 

Weathering the storm

I live in South Africa, where in the last year or so there have been profound levels of change and uncertainty. Looking into the future, there is an increasing amount of anxiety around dinner tables and people asking what has now become the familiar question – “What is going to happen?” I sometimes wish that I had a crystal ball and had the ability to answer eloquently and with a heightened sense of wisdom.

The more I am posed with this question, the more I see the need to reflect and try and answer it. Primarily for myself but more importantly for the people that I socialize with, be it family, friends, clients and/or possible business partners. It has now become customary and expected at many of social engagements that one has to provide an answer.   Writing this blog is an attempt to answer the question personally and by grace I hope to reach and influence others.

“If one thing is certain, times are uncertain. Still everyone wants a path to success.” Kevin J Daum.

As humans we are all of on a quest to succeed and find happiness whatever the prevailing circumstances might be. It is the one thing that probably separates us, as humans (at least in my belief system)… The one thing that distinguishes us from our co-inhabitants on planet earth. We are always in search of success, happiness and more importantly ‘meaning and purpose’. We seek to make a difference and leave some sort of legacy.

How do you do this in times of uncertainty? How do you lead yourself and others through this often complex and volatile world? With this blog, I will attempt to answer those questions, as I am not one who likes to live by chance or meander around aimlessly without a plan. Some people believe that sometimes “no plan is the best plan.” To me, this is a higher level of consciousness and I must admit I am not yet there. I understand what ‘surrender’ is, and often times I wish that I would develop the competence to ‘give over to a higher self’ or the universe… But I personally struggle to implement this in my own life. I do however ask that you indulge me and allow me to share my thoughts in this regard.

Before I do that, I would like to refer you to a YouTube interview with Satya Twena in Gerard Adams on ‘Leaders Create Leaders’. A big part of me is fascinated by Satya Twena’s story. She came to America/New York with no job, no money and no plan on what she is going to do and today she is running a very successful hat factory. I encourage you to find this clip as her journey and story is very inspiring. However, her starting point might be a little unnerving for someone who is as risk averse as I am.

Let me share some tips for you to ponder and engage on:

• Embrace change and learn to ride the wave – as indicated change and uncertainty is as certain as the fact that the sun will rise from the east and set in the west. It does not help if you do not anticipate and prepare for this eventuality. A time of volatility and uncertainty can be the best time to prepare adaptation strategies, reinvent yourself, and diversify your offerings. Remember everyone is looking for an answer or a solution so dig deep and think out of the box and provide workable solutions that will give you competitive advantage. Remember, the more the uncertainty there more people would be looking for “how to’’ solutions – Ride the wave and be the go to person during these times.
• Be focused and stay on course – in order to make it in these times we needs clear dreams and goals that will remain our compass to find our true north or organisational mission. This is not the time to go for short cuts however, it is the time to sharpen our resolve to dream big and relentlessly pursue the mission as if your dreams and goals are congruent with who you are and offer the much desired solutions. So how do you justify using setbacks and life challenges to derail you? Keep moving and continuously put one foot in front of the other!!! Be purposeful, remain focused and before you know it, you will have climbed a mountain! My daily affirmation in these times is – “keeping it moving”.
• Be grateful and celebrate success – Being grateful of how far you have come is a great motivator for dealing with uncertainty. Count your blessings and as you do this daily, you will be amazed at how much you have achieved and marvel at all the great things that you have to offer. I keep a gratitude journal and when the chips are down I go back to it. Often times I realise how far I have come and how giving up will be throwing away all of those gains. Of course, the small celebrations (in economically challenging times, even a cup of cappuccino as a treat!!) are a great motivator for individuals and teams.

Leading in uncertain times requires a lot of personal resilience and inner strength! However there is nothing that tastes a sweet as a victory once you have weathered the storm.

Pam Yako

Leadership Coach

‘Helping women leaders to be attuned and find their inner goddess’

http://www.zenandeleadership.com

+27 12 998 7337 or +27 82 550 5225

pam@zenandeleadership.com

Skype: pam.the.coach

p.s. please feel free to contact me if you want to learn more about this or sign up for my newsletter at http://www.zenandeleadership.com